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Tale of a Free Table

By Lawrence Benedict 'Malystryx' Phillips
Oct 16, 2008 20:35

My tale of how I got myself a free computer table, but not without hardwork, sweat, odd looks and the help of a stranger!

The 10 minute walk from my house to the local bus stop is normally a dull journey with only the musical waves eminating from my mp3 to brighten it up, however not today! Walking home I saw outside a charity shop was a computer table! My wife had seen it in the morning and it was £3 (bargain) but she must have made the shop realise they'd never sell it when she did not buy it.So walking home the charity shop's doors were closed but outside low and behold the computer table with a sticker on it saying "FREE". Wahey!

The slide out table for the printer was half broken and it only had 3 wheels, no problem I thought. Quickly gave my wife a ring to tell her the computer table is free "yes I know three pounds", no free, F-R-E-E "oooooo"! So I began dragging it back to the house, only 20 m and 1 wheel is off, quickly pocketed it to put on again later.

Next thing I know some Indian woman comes out of her house to ask if I'd stolen it, I don't really live in a dodgy area but I was dressed in sports clothes at the time so she must have thought I was a naughty kiddo with an ASBO. I tried to explain it was free, but she was too busy inspecting me, I assume trying to deduce whether I was carrying a fire-arm or a knife. You know the kind of people that laugh with you but inside you know they think you're dispicable.

Ah well :D I carried on another 30m or so before the table seemed to slow down, damnit another wheel off. Then some old gentleman walks past "hoho you left a wheel back there" (bonus points for perceptiveness) I squint my eyes and ask where is it, "THERE!" he points about 25m behind me then just gives me a thumbs up and walks off. (why didn't he pick it up if he saw me up ahead?).\r\n\r\nSo now I've got 1 wheel and its shape makes it too awkward to carry, so I have to balance it like a diamond on one wheel which proves stupidly slow.

It's taken me half an hour to get around 70m home. I sit on the table, (note this on the pavement on a busy street) well worth the looks, can see peoples heads follow you round as they drive past. I started waving in a vain attempt to get people to pick me up but then people just wave back then look smug because the person next to them in the car thinks they are popular.

Oh well, after a little rest drag it along the road again leaving white chalklike marks as the metal where the wheels should be drags along the floor. Then I stop again, in the middle of the road and hear someone ask "where are you going" from a house nearby, I said I lived nearby 2 mins drive, "hop in i'll give you a lift!". Hahahaha, I was so bloody proud. So got home and voila the photo above, legend.

You can not tell me buying a table brand new is the same as this, finding one for free, dragging it home and a stranger offering you a lift home! You do not need to buy the best and most expensive things to feel satisfaction, the best things in life are truely free and this table is going to kick ass. \r\n\r\nNow all I need is 3 more wheels...



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